Touching Girls

This post is a response to comments on various blogs, claiming that there is no sexual harassment in Georgia.

Hey you, yes you, the one who writes that Georgian men respect women, the one who claims that perverts do not exist here, that streets are safe and that it is women’s fault if they get touched! I am going to be very honest with you and tell you little stories that happened to me or my friends…

Stuff like that does not happen to me anymore, but when I was a teenager, all sorts of creepy men took advantage of my vulnerable situation.

Once, my very conservative friend was sitting in marshrutka and she saw a guy petting something in the corner. She thought he had a puppy or a bird. Turned out, it was a not a bird. My friend was so ashamed, she did not dare to say anything.

Often, in a crowded bus, I felt men standing behind me. I used to calm myself by thinking that it was probably a briefcase or an umbrella, because there was nowhere to move and I couldn’t allow myself to imagine anything else. Needless to say, many times it was not an umbrella.

My first year in university, a man with his pants down used to scream out offensive stuff just by our university, on the Varazis khevi hill, by the zoo. He stood there, with dick in his hand, everyday. How he did not catch cold is beyond me. My friend complained that since there are no houses on that hill, no local boys could protect their territory from this man. Everyday, I pretended that I did not notice how he called me slut and exposed himself. During our daily complaining session (truth to be told, this pantless man provided us with stuff to talk about), one of the girls told us: “oh that guy! When I pass him, I throw rocks at him and he hides in the bushes!”. That’s how I learned that most of those sick men would disappear at the slightest confrontation.

I can tell you many stories like that. So what? You would say that those men are just sick people and that every county has them? But that is only half of the problem isn’t it? The worst thing is that teenage girls get so lost during this encounters, they either become mute or try to convince themselves that nothing happened. And no one ever tells them or teaches them what to do in such situation.

I mean really, imagine you are this Georgian virgin girl, who maybe hasn’t even kissed a boy and the first penis you see in your life is this gross penis of a gross man in a gross underground passage! One might develop penis phobia…I probably shouldn’t go there…

Everybody knows what I am talking about, but mo one dares to admit that they have been exposed to other men’s penises, cause they feel guilty!

And you, you big-bellied, hairy-shouldered, cheating-with-the-prostitutes but drinking-for-respecting-women guy, you claim that there is no sexual harassment in this country! I hope one day you’ll have to take a bus and when you look around, you will see that the umbrella that has been poking you for 15 minutes, is really not an umbrella at all!

the pic: our gray umbrella.

Another Brick in the F...n Wall

When I look out of the window at work, I see brick wall. It is discouraging. I look out to get distracted and can’t find anything to see.

Very often I feel like I am surrounded by brick walls. I get angry, I get upset, but I can’t change anything.

I am gradually loosing skills that I have listed in CV. It is getting harder to analyze, I am less passionate about my work, my leadership abilities are gone out of the window. Most of the days I focus on finishing short-term tasks and feel lucky if I cross items on a to-do list and at the same time, eat lunch and go home on time. Most of the days, five-minute tea is a luxury and an hour-long lunch—fantasy.

I can’t deal with ignorance, ambiguity, disrespect, total apathy. I can’t anymore. I feel that I am becoming ignorant, ambiguous, apathetic. Like this post--unfocused and all over the place.

Collaboration, partnership, those terms are unknown to us, at work and at home. I am lucky to have a safe refuge at home. I am very lucky.

Brick walls are everywhere and no one wants to help, no one cares. Everybody strictly does what they have to; they are busy, they are afraid. And if they cared, wanted, needed, now they just try to get through the day.

What? Am I exaggerating? When was the last time you felt thrilled, when you felt like you have accomplished something important?

I have discovered that for a while now, I care less about the issue that I am working to improve. I became used to it. I see the whole picture now and I have two choices: either I stop worrying about it and care less or I ruin my cardiovascular system.

So, you keep on going with no results. And the only thing you can see from your window is a brick wall.

Can this post get more pathetic? Oh, but it can! Check out the view from my window on the pic!

My Vice: Reality of the Reality Shows

We are behind in many things, but one of them is of imperative importance: we could never have Real Housewives of Tbilisi! For those of you who don’t know what I am talking about, it is one of those shows that nobody admits watching. There are multiple franchises of this reality show, including real housewives of Orange County, Beverly Hills, New Jersey, New York, Atlanta and Miami. They feature a bunch of rich, usually mindless women, spending lots of money and quarelling with each other. It makes me endlessly happy to watch them fight; every time I want to buy something ridiculous and I can’t, it gives me comfort, knowing that they can buy everything they want, but they are still stupid. Plus, they all look like aliens, with fake boobs and botoxed foreheads.

One could ask why couldn’t we film Real Housewives of Tbilisi, is it because Tbilisi doesn’t have its own collection of dumb, rich ladies? No, my friends, but I can’t imagine some businessman allowing his wife to flaunt her spending habits like that. That would guarantee Big Brother inspecting your accounts.

Reality shows feed my soul. They provide everything I need. Real Housewives make me feel good about myself; my recent addiction, 11 seasons of The Apprentice, inspires me. Oh, to watch a hair-challenged Donald Trump, giving contestants business tasks and firing loosers... Last night, I caught myself thinking: if they can pull this off, surely I can pesture my boss for that signature! I will not give up, Mr. Trump, please don’t fire me! I have so much strength and dedication!

We had something like that here, but it turned out to be lame. Cause really, nothing trumps Trump (sorry I had to make this joke).

Reality shows educate me. For 5 years now, I’ve been devouring every season of Heide Klum’s “Project Runway”. Jokes aside, it is really a good show. 12 desingners make interesting outfits and tasks are usually exiting and challenging. I've seen people design cocktail dresses from candy wraps, I’ve seen avangarde fashion and drag queen costumes, I now know that Michael Cors, the guest judge, likes to look like an orange…he tans a lot. The final three contestants show their collections on NY fashion week.

Why couldn't we have this show here? Maybe because Lali Totikashvili (who is a sweet lady) is not Haide Klum. Because neither Georgian, nor Tbilisi Fashion week is the NY fashion week. Because we wouldn’t have enough aspiring designers for more than one season. And because Avto Tskvitinidze, no matter his success, is not as orange as Michael Cors.

My fav. Reality show, Top Chef, introduced me to food I would never try before. I know what Foie gras looks (and spells) like. I know that ceviche is fish that gets cooked in acid, with no heat needed. This show inspires me to make risotto the right way. Also... it makes me very hungry.

We wouldn’t have Top Chef in Georgia…well, because we don’t have chefs here. I can’t imagine Khinkali-themed Top Chef.

So basically, we suck. Cause all we can do is sing and dance and all of our reality shows are about that. And it gets repetitive!

P.S. I am breaking tradition of posting only the pics that I (and hubby) take to share this beautiful man with the humanity... this is Curtis Stone, a celebrity chef. Has been on The Celebrity Apprentice and hosts Top Chef Masters. He is all I love about reality show contestant--has some skill, is hot, is confident, and I don't normally like him. Really, I hate smug blond guys with blues eyes and gel-spiked hair. But there is something about this one...